Claimer: I'm not a political person. I don't concern myself in politics, vote, nor start up jokes about political figures. Only sometimes when someone says something odd and/or funny enough for my imagination to roar.
Like this one.
Warning: Some jokes are... dirty. And disturbingly political.
Key:
Jennifer Fulk, Jen = Me
M B = Female friend whose identity is concealed for privacy purposes
M R = M B's male friend whom I have never met nor have communicated with until this conversation
C P = Female friend who escaped before things got bad and likes bananas
M B
GOSH DARN IT NETFLIX, why'd ya have to be down for maintenance??
- Jennifer Fulk Oh nose!
- M B Our connection is being slow enough it's stopping it from working.
- Jennifer Fulk Yuck. Like walking in deep mud that sucks you in even as you try to walk.
- M B Skklfmnsjsjsnnndjd
- Jennifer Fulk Such is the combined chorus of feet being pulled out of mud and Netflix failing to work.
- M B SCCCCHLKLUUURP.
- Jennifer Fulk Such is the sound of a kid eating jell-O with a straw while walking in mud while trying to watch a
- failed Netflix.
- M B Hahahahaha
- M B Now I wanna go eat jello with a straw.
- [M B makes a bigger, longer sound effect post but it was somehow deleted]
- Jennifer Fulk Such is the sound of the farmer named Bob belching and farting as his kid eats Jell-O with a straw
- as they walk together in the mud as they try to watch a failed Netflix.
- M B Hahahahaha
- M B Oh dear.
- M B LOL. someone make a film of this.
- C P I LIKE BANANAS!!
- Jennifer Fulk I have three legs. My mom gave me a sour lemon to make my nose pucker, but it's already long
- enough. I told my mom that I didn't want a puckering nose, but she insisted. Now I am a liar. My nose is yellow. I
- sneezed and seeds came out. It grew into a tall vine with lemons all over it. Oh, but my hands are already yellow
- from picking dandelions.
- Jennifer Fulk I don't want to climb it therefore.
- Jennifer Fulk My mom just shouted, "STOP OR I'LL POP!!!!!"
- Jennifer Fulk Real life. I don't know what she's talking about. I think the world has gone crazy.
- M B well, now we know who's the one on drugs in this conversation. lol
- M B But actually. which part is real life?? Haha
- Jennifer Fulk Both and neither at the same time. We live in double realities.
- Jennifer Fulk Which is divided into four.
- Jennifer Fulk Which is a atom of both thoughts and "I don't know what I'm saying anymore so yeah".
- Jennifer Fulk ."
- M B Ah. Naturally.
- SO I WANT AN INSTANT TRANSPORT MACHINE SO WE CAN HANG OUT. BALKjfkskkdkd
- Jennifer Fulk Does the raspberry very passionately
- Jennifer Fulk I am kissing the my other universal self!
- Jennifer Fulk You were saying?
- M B EW GROSS. That's like...kissing your sibling. Haha
- Jennifer Fulk Oh, yes! Everyone needs a TARDIS because simple real life is retarded.
- Jennifer Fulk My twin sister named Jennifer is such a romantic.
- Jennifer Fulk *breathes on mirror*
- Jennifer Fulk *makes grotesque faces*
- M B LOL get a room.
- Jennifer Fulk Great idea! Which hotel should we have our honeymoon?
- Jennifer Fulk I'm getting high on non-alcoholic eggnog *snorts*
- Jennifer Fulk I just can't wait!
- M R Here ya go buddy, this'll help pass your time:http://threewordphrase.com/changed.gif
- The next button is your friend.
- M B Ohhhh, morbid. LOL.
- M B Oops. I liked my comment instead of yours.
- M B Just the gif, though, no next button.
- Jennifer Fulk LOL OMG!!!
- Not for kids. Like, actual kids.
- threewordphrase.com
- Jennifer Fulk Actually, if Rudolph rapes me (see crazyfacebookconversations.blogspot.com if you don't
- understand), that could be useful. But, then. There would still be a problem with the zombie reindeer....
- M B Oh gosh, that again. lol
- M B Bahaha. This comic is fantastic.
- M B so kids over 21 or so don't count? lol
- M R I don't understand. I do not think that I want to.
- M B LOL perhaps not. On the other hand, the conversation is recorded and was actually funny. In a "it's late and
- nothing Jennifer says is being filtered" sort of way. Lol
- M R I will never understand Rudolph and "rape" in a sentence unless there is a specific notation and
- explanation.
- Jennifer Fulk Random thoughts pour from my head like somebody shouted in the crowd, "Hey! It's the end of the
- world! So, quick! Say something from the top of your head and share it like you're on the top of the world!"
- Jennifer Fulk Or on the top of an unopened bottle of milk.
- Jennifer Fulk Dang those things freak me out.
- M R What, babies? I hate them too. Could be worse. Like Doug Stanhope said of Sarah Palin, "it's like somebody
- stood next to her v***** and yelled "hey, Koolaid!" You enjoy the miracle of childbirth.
- Jennifer Fulk All I could think of for a moment just now was Sarah Palin giving birth to the Koolaid guy. (I do NOT hate babies!)
- M B Haha better not start him up on the "let's see who can be the most random and/or shocking" contest, you
- might have met your match. Lol
- Jennifer Fulk "OHHH YYYEAHHHHH!"
- M B LOL you two, I can't breathe oh gosh. That was such a disturbing mental image...
- Jennifer Fulk Say, what flavor of Koolaid? Grape? I like grape.
- M B This is all that question makes me think of...http://youtu.be/Ow7pwIDhl5c
- More @ http://www.noob.us/ - Hilarious new sketch from Whitest Kids U Know. OPEN WIDE KIDS, CAUSE IM GONNA GRRRAPE YOU IN THE MOUTH!
- Jennifer Fulk Ah..... So this was the guy who raped Sarah Palin. Then she had his kid: The grape-flavored
- Koolaid guy!
- M B LOL JENNIFER
- Jennifer Fulk
- M B nassssssstttyyyy
- Jennifer Fulk (Palin pictured)
- M R No! Red. And yes. Koolaid man and internal organs is always hoorofic.
- Jennifer Fulk NO! It MUST be purple!
- M B Wait, is that really palin???
- Agreed! Grape is nasty! And I just googled "grape kool aid" and found pictures of squeeze-it's. Oh gosh. I miss
- those things.
- WHERE DO YOU FIND THESE PICTURES
- Jennifer Fulk Inject purple dye in her blood and it shall be purple!!
- Jennifer Fulk (No, really, my favorite flavor is cherry. Gotta' have a grape joke continue somehow)
- M R Here's a thought: I am bigger and stronger than both of you combined and I know how to fight and do not
- fear poain. Oh look, i just won any and all past and future arguements. *WinklikeSaddamHussein.*
- Jennifer Fulk
- M B HA nice try. But we all agree anyways, so it's okay.
- Haha nooooooooooooo
- M R What's this "we" stuff?
- Jennifer Fulk And yes it's Palin. Found them on Google images except for the duck. I made it in Paint 2 years
- ago.
- Jennifer Fulk (I was very bored and had a lot of time on my hands.)
- M B We all agree purple kool aid is NOT the best.
- M R "Better Red than Dead."
- Jennifer Fulk When I was a kid, I liked a lot of grape flavored stuff, but mainly out of color choice. Red was a
- boyish and more firey and violent color that my brother liked. I liked the color blue, so I often chose grape flavors.
- Then I finally tried new things and totally ditched everything grape.
- Jennifer Fulk I was a weird kid.
- M B Yeah, so I was I.
- Jennifer Fulk Hey! I'm wearing pants!
- M B I just googled that phrase and learned a little bit about the world! ha!
- Jennifer Fulk See?
- M R Never buy into your assigned gender rolls. Green things tend to be all sorts of good.
- Jennifer Fulk Lawns under my feet are so green!
- M B Ha! I should have learned that lesson when I was six or seven......woulda saved me a lot of grief at kids
- asking me, "are you a girl or a boy?" Now, I would just laugh at them. I was definitely that girl that hated Disney
- princesses, though.
- M R ^"Awesome is that" said Yoda.
- M B I also had a huge crush on yoda. For, like, ever. Lol
- Jennifer Fulk I only really liked Pocahontas, Snow White and Cinderella. The more rugged ones.
- M R ...He was a 900 year old telekinetic frog with odd syntax. Just saying...
- M B Exactly.
- Jennifer Fulk R2D2 and C3PO. "Oh, R2! You're so short and have a cute voice!" "C3PO! You're so tall and shiny!"
- You have to admit that C3PO had a good bod.
- Jennifer Fulk
- M R I do not, No suck thing.
- Jennifer Fulk Yoda's Halloween costume or Kermit's? You decide.
- Jennifer Fulk garfagushamoomgarmhfwagawagayarchae!
- Jennifer Fulk ARGH! They got away! NEXT TIME!!!!!!!
