Google Can't Hear You Say, "Who Washed Washington's White Woolen Underwear, The Washerwoman Went West"

I Google-searched the tongue twister using my microphone. Not once did it hear me correctly. I tried talking very distinctly, in a deeper voice, in a high-pitched voice, in an English accent, in a Southern accent, loudly, quietly, slower, faster, closer to the microphone, farther from the microphone -- nothing made it hear me exactly.
Here's what it thought I said:

"who watched Washington flight 100 watch women went west."

"who walked Washington flight 101 for women." 

"who was Washington's white woman underwear the washwoman went west."

"who was Washington's white woman underwear The Watchmen what West."

"who washed Washington's white woman underwear the washer woman went west."

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  Jennifer Fulk   who washed Washington's white wool in underwear the washer woman went west

  
  
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• Jennifer Fulk   [[[[[I think Google is officially deaf or has a terribly funny sense of humor]]]]]]

  
  

The Toothbrush Assassin

In the middle of the night, I mix carob in vanilla soy cream (equivalent of chocolate ice cream (I'm lactose intolerant) and have the whole pint for dinner (mostly because I forgot about it). I laugh about the mark it leaves, a perfect mark akin to lip liner (you probably can't see it). I laugh even harder when M B comes in as she brushes her teeth. (I was originally using my Chromebook camera as a mirror, when she comes in view with a creepy face. I take the picture, and I get this:

Jennifer Fulk

January 8

You know when I'm at M B's when:
1: I have carob soy cream lip liner on.
2: This: — with M B.

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  M B:  Hehehehhe

  January 8 at 10:27pm via mobile 
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  Jennifer Fulk:  Crazed murderer + murder weapon

  January 8 at 10:28pm 
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  H N:  First thought that popped into my head on seeing this:
  
  REDRUM!

  January 9 at 12:22am 

Justin Bieber Cutout Prank... Gone Wrong!

Jennifer Fulk

September 4, 2013

My much belated senior prank.
I couldn't figure out what exactly I was going to do - until the other day. My sister wanted to get rid of it, so then I knew exactly what to do....
*evil smirky face*

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R C, A S, and M B like this.

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  M B:  LOL

  September 4, 2013 at 8:24pm via mobile · Like
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  R C:  This is great haha

  September 5, 2013 at 11:21am · Like
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  Jennifer Fulk:  Last night, my mom finally remembered to tell me: The night I left it there, my mom & sis were going to the store, passing by it. There was a guy who was pulling it out and trying to tape it up and fix it. Suddenly, a cop car drove up speeding on the lawn of the school close to my mom and sis. They were freaked out. The person in the car came out and very sternly asked the guy what he was doing. "I just found this in the bushes, so I'm just taping it and fixing it!" The cop yelled at him, "Well, get out here and take it somewhere else!" So, no one got to see it on the morning of the first day of school. And that was the last time it was seen again.  lol

  September 20, 2013 at 7:46pm · Like · 1
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  Jennifer Fulk:  Oh, yeah. It was hard to put it in there 'cause there were hundreds of spider webs everywhere. Eee!

  September 20, 2013 at 7:47pm · Like · 1